Christmas Eve thoughts.

Everyone has their Christmas stories, and this is mine, tonight anyway.
Christmas was always special. Seems like nice things always happen near the holidays. Jake asked me to marry him on his birthday, after my company Christmas party on December 10, 1998.
I remember when I was a little girl....And Christmas Eve too. On more than one Christmas eve....my dad would play the guitar and my mom would play the organ and we would all sit near the real christmas tree (I remember it had those stringy shiny icicle things all over it and when I would walk past they would stick to me because of static electricity). We would sing Christmas carols. My Dad would be rockin' the guitar and with a big Elvis Presley type smile, and sideburns to match and would be singing his version of "Here comes Santa Claus, Here comes Santa Claus....right down santa claus lane!" Oh god, we'd be excited. And then I remember when they would both sing..."Walking in a winter wonderland"....and then mom would sing.... "Silent Night" (In my head I can hear it right now) My mom's voice was awesome. I remember when I was a kid I really thought she had an angel's voice.

My whole entire life, it was my mother who always made sure that us kids' holidays were special. Right now, as I look under my tree. I see the gifts that my mother sent me and my family and I see how much work she put into them....even just the wrapping...they are beautiful. And I know that she put a lot of effort into what's inside. Shopping is a pain in the butt, but she's ALWAYS been good at it. And then the food, of course it was always special, in some way. Fancy waffles for breakfast and a big dinner with lots of snacks throughout.

One Christmas eve, after my oldest children were born, I was single and didn't have much money at all. I worried how I could make Christmas special for them. I think I had a total of 3 gifts for them, all from the Dollar general. I talked to mom about it and she had a great idea. We all come to her house and celebrate at her house, fall asleep Christmas eve and wait for Santa over there! And another Christmas eve, when the kids and me lived in a very small apartment and I had no where to store the bikes ... late that night my mom and Eric drove 30-40 miles at midnight in the middle of a terrible snowstorm to bring the gifts to our house so the kids would have a special Christmas. And they would do the same thing for my sister's kids, no questions asked!!

My sister and I were always spoiled at Christmastime. These days, with so many people to buy for, our Christmas' are not as obscenely big, but still they are always special...which is what I love!

I've always tried to do the same for my kids. My kids, even when they were real little and we didn't have much to make a decent holiday meal...well, we always had mom's house to go to. And, I've always made a big ta do about the holidays if I could. Luckily I don't think they remember the years when there were only a couple gifts.

Right now it is Christmas eve and it is bedtime. Ann-Marie already has sugar plumbs dancing in her head. And Jake and Brandon are watching football. But all day long I have been cooking and baking and I probably will again tomorrow. Tonight for supper we had a nice lobster tails and king crab leg dinner. Tomorrow they get the choice of blueberry or strawberry's and cream on their pancakes and then later, a big turkey dinner.

The generations change. We didn't sit by the tree singing christmas carols (well maybe just a couple), but we watched (in technicolor) Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer and periodically checked http://www.noradsanta.org/index.php . Brandon and Ann-Marie put out the cookies and milk (which Ann-Marie decided the cookies and carrots needed to be on 'her kitchen' dishes from her room) . I imagine the day when my kids' kids plug in some kind of an interactive holographic chip to watch and interact with 'Santa'. Generations change, but hopefully I have instilled in them that the holidays should be special, just like my parents did to me. Thanks Mom...Merry Christmas everyone and I love and miss you all.